{"id":329,"date":"2005-06-24T20:21:11","date_gmt":"2005-06-24T20:21:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/"},"modified":"2005-06-24T20:21:11","modified_gmt":"2005-06-24T20:21:11","slug":"no-tuna-on-the-pizza","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/2005\/no-tuna-on-the-pizza\/","title":{"rendered":"No Tuna on the Pizza"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Anyone who has ever lived with me knows I hate tuna. I <i>really<\/i> hate tuna. Last year I had a crossed-out tuna fish on my bedroom door, and my apartment-mate Gerry gave me a warning every time he opened a can.<br \/>\nTonight, after a hellish-hot-and-long public ride home, I preheated the oven and took a pizza labeled &#8220;Pizza Quattro Stagioni&#8221; out of the freezer. See, here in Austria pizzas are like breeds of dogs. They all have unique names and you&#8217;re expected to know what each name entails.<br \/>\nThe exception I guess is &#8220;Pizza Quattro Stagioni,&#8221; which I guess only means &#8220;Pizza Four Seasons.&#8221; I guess the &#8220;seasons&#8221; can change because I always bought this pizza by name, and never had a problem with the &#8220;seasons.&#8221;<br \/>\nTonight I discovered that one of the &#8220;seasons&#8221; was tuna. Just to make sure, I gave the section a sniff, and despite being frozen, it smelled like the worst smell in the world&#8230; Tuna! My first attempt to bypass this misfortune was to try to scrape the tuna off. I got most of it off, but some of it was still frozen deep into the pizza.<br \/>\nBecoming a bit more drastic, I got out a large sharp knife and cut the section out. Cutting a frozen pizza is about as hard as meeting a girl in Vienna, but I eventually succeeded. My meal was reduced by 25 percent tonight, but I&#8217;ll survive. If I had eaten tuna it would have been a different story!<br \/>\n<center><a href=\"http:\/\/newkai.com\/mt\/archives\/images\/freezerpizza.html\" onclick=\"window.open('http:\/\/newkai.com\/mt\/archives\/images\/freezerpizza.html','popup','width=855,height=641,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/newkai.com\/mt\/archives\/images\/freezerpizza-thumb.jpg\" width=\"300\" height=\"224\" \/><\/a><br \/>My final creation<\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Anyone who has ever lived with me knows I hate tuna. I really hate tuna. Last year I had a crossed-out tuna fish on my bedroom door, and my apartment-mate Gerry gave me a warning every time he opened a can. Tonight, after a hellish-hot-and-long public ride home, I preheated the oven and took a&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[183],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-329","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/329","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=329"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/329\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=329"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=329"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/newkai.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=329"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}