Ok I need a few laughs, and I have quite a few stories to share.  So here is my first contribution.  Right now I live in a single in a coed dorm (that happens to have very thin walls).  Anyway my next door neghbor who happens to be a COMPLETE BITCH has her boyfriend sleep over a lot.  Anyway, nothing out of the ordinary there, but one night I awoke to the Sound of Music (quite literally).  That is, she and her boyfriend were singing Doe a Deer (off key too if I may add).  The song lasted through one verse and then ended abruptly and was followed by heavy breathing, panting, and screaming.  So yes, I guess some people do get turned on by the Sound of Music.
Well the possible hidden sexual connotation of that song is no secret. I mean:

"Doe, a deer, a female deer
Ray, a drop of golden sun
...
Sew, a needle pulling thread"

All three of these lines could be hidden sexual connotation. The whole "grownup jokes in kids movies" thing we were talking about in Atlanta.

The best example I can think of is Grease. That musical is 99% sex, but still PG-rated.

Anyway, in regards to The Sound of Music, here is a little segment from a journal article/review by Dawn Taylor I read last semester for my human sex class:

Quote
The Sound of Music really is all about sex. Maria is too feisty to be a good nun, and we see this not just through her constant singing and tardiness but also from her sensual nature. She flounces around the hillside when she should be in vespers, removing her widgen (or whatever it is they call that thing nuns wear on their heads) and basking in the sun and the air and the fresh, green grass. On her way to her new position as governess, Maria sings "I Have Confidence" while kicking up her heels and showing her underwear. On the Captain's return with his ladyfriend, the Baroness, Maria and the children tip over their rowboat and Maria greets the couple dripping wet, which the worldly Baroness does not fail to notice. She also spots the way Maria gets all moony and soft-focused when the Captain sings "Edelweiss" — and the look the Captain gives the soft-focused Maria in return. And let's not overlook that "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" song: Liesl singing to Rolf "totally unprepared am I to face a world of men/timid and shy and scared am I of things beyond my ken/ I need someone older and wiser telling me what to do ..." as she hoochies herself (dripping wet, do we sense a theme?) all over the gaze.


Now once you discover all these hidden "features" in The Sound of Music, I would think becoming turned on by it becomes much easier. You can watch the entire piece again and pick out all the hints at sex. I haven't even seen the thing, despite being Austrian.

So are you suggesting I break out into song and sing "Doe a Deer" next time I want to get some action?  Or is that how you pick up the ladies?  hahahaha
mmm... you might be on to something...:)
LOL! This thread is really something...just hilarious...  :laugh:
You can't tell me that no one has funny or embarrassing stories!  Come on I have tons!  Both High School and College.  I feel like I post too much already so someone write something quick!

Funny or embarassing stories...let me see oh yeah! Kai and Thorsten had to share a single full size bed (that means 1 small bed for 2 guys) over Thanksgiving break and I took the pull out couch downstairs.  The funny part is there was a lot of noise coming from upstairs until about 04h00. :laughlong:
I was going to get Kai's camera that he left on the coffee table but I just figured that would be too gay and decided to sneak into Danielles' room instead  :bigwow:

I had to do something hetero after even thinking about filming those two.   
:high:

Quote (Kenny G @ Dec. 07 2004, 08:49)
The funny part is there was a lot of noise coming from upstairs until about 04h00. :laughlong:

Oh hell no! The only noise from our room was Friday night, when I kept throwing Thorsten off the bed, causing him to go sleep downstairs.

Quote (Kenny G @ Dec. 07 2004, 08:51)
I was going to get Kai's camera that he left on the coffee table but I just figured that would be too gay and decided to sneak into Danielles' room instead  :bigwow:

I had to do something hetero after even thinking about filming those two.   
:high:


Yeah, except you didn't realize that Danielle's room is actually upstairs, not downstairs, and you woke up between Andrew and the dog.  :laughlong:

sorry Kai, but i was very particular about watching to see which room Danielle went into that night. :p
Quote (newkai @ Dec. 07 2004, 11:02)
Oh hell no! The only noise from our room was Friday night, when I kept throwing Thorsten off the bed, causing him to go sleep downstairs.

Are you sure you were just "throwing him off the bed" because it sounded more like to queers "wrestling" to me.  :laughlong:
But if you were just throwing him off the bed, it was probably because Thorsten was tired of being on the receiving end all of the time and wanted to be on the other end of the stick.  And of course you weren't going to have any of that now were you.  :laugh:

Now I understand why they say it's always better to give than to receive! :p
Quote (Kenny G @ Dec. 07 2004, 13:56)
Quote (newkai @ Dec. 07 2004, 11:02)
Oh hell no! The only noise from our room was Friday night, when I kept throwing Thorsten off the bed, causing him to go sleep downstairs.

Are you sure you were just "throwing him off the bed" because it sounded more like to queers "wrestling" to me.  :laughlong:

You weren't even there Friday night! Got you there!
Quote (Kenny G @ Dec. 07 2004, 13:58)
Now I understand why they say it's always better to give than to receive! :p

Speak for yourself buddy!
oh lordy...this is almost becoming obscene. um...funny stories, funny stories...my freshmen year, we all went out maybe the second weekend of the year to this outdoor club (recall that i was then in florence, italy). anyhow, she ended up hooking up with our neighbour two doors down (who later became my brazilian husband-nothing like that. he has a girlfriend for his special needs). the thing is, he had three other roommates, and someone ended up filming them and putting the tape on the "network" that the whole campus had access to...BWAH HA HA HA HA

her bad. she turned out to be a fat whore anyway.

Hahahaha lovely!
Ok another funny story...hmmmm oh this happened recently.  Right now I work as a server in my schools' Athenaeum.  (Restaurant/place where prestigious people come and talk, yada yada).  Anyway, every Christmas they have this thing called Madrigal Feast.  Everythign is decorated in medieval decor, and there is a special procession of food, etc.  As a server I was required to dress as a wentch.  (Puffy white shirt, corset, potato sack skirt, and ugly cap).  Anyway, I'm digressing here, so at the beginning of the ceremony the wentches (myself) have to escort the men and the knaves escort the women.  
   So, along comes this 40+ year old man and he immediately runs over to me and says he wants me to take him to his table.  A little strange, but I proceed to take his arm and walk into the room.
Perky: "Good evening sir, where are you seated this evening?"
Man: "Does it matter, my place or yours!"
Perky: "*fake laugh* Oh you are so bad!"
Man: "NO!  Actually I'm REALLY GOOD!"
Perky: (a little concerned now) "hehehe alright well let's find your table shall we?"
Man: "No!  Let's leave my wife isn't looking!" (as he proceedes to massage my hands)


EWWWWWW Creepy Creepy old man.  Funny now, but at the time, super creepy!
I really don't have any funny stories...

I mean, there's the Brno KFC story, which was a "funny if you were there story," but it'll probably suck in writing.

Thorsten and I, along with a friend of ours, Cathrine, took a road trip to Brno, the second-largest city in the Czech Republic, and the closest Czech city of any decent size to Vienna, this summer. On our way back, as it was getting dark, we wanted to stop by this KFC in this "Futurama Mall" or whatever its called, that we had seen on our way in. I missed the exit, and the next exit wasn't for another good five minutes. So after a total of ten extra minutes, we finally made it to KFC.

We were hungry and had a lot of whatever-their-currency-is-called left, so we decided to get the largest thing on the menu, the "Picnic Menu." Talk about us being stereotypical North Americans! I bet after we left the employees laughed their asses off at us. But anyway, we ordered it, and the guy on the other side of the counter basically froze. He then shook his head slowly and mumbled "Uh-oh." We thought that meant no. But after a little pleading we were told that it would take 15 minutes. So we got our big-ass container, got out of there, and had great chicken all the way home.

Oh, and we were also considering playing loud-ass Reinhard Fendrich "I am From Austria" at the border, but thought better of it!

Not there is much of a border left anyway. The Czech make fun of you by practicing their German and laughing at themselves, and the Austrians see that your car is from Western Europe and don't give a damn.
This story is called, "Oh My God! They Almost Killed Kenny!"

    My friend, Brian, and I went over to his g/f's house (Amber) because she called him up and told him that she had something important to tell him.  (everyone with me so far: friend=Brian, Brian's g/f=Amber, Amber calls brian and tells him to get his ass over right now, I'm just taggin along)
    Well, when we get there, Amber's older brother, Mark, and their neighbor (his name is Dustin) are both in the backyard workin, and Amber grabs Brian and pulls him into her bedroom. (She didn't want to talk, she just wanted to have sex) So I go outside and decide to help Mark and Dustin rake leaves in a pile.  Now, keep in mind that I was 17, Brian-17, Amber-16, Mark (the brother)-18 and Dustin-16. We're all about the same age, but Dustin isn't really as smart as he should be at 16.
    So when we get the leaves in a pile, Mark tells Dustin to poor gas on the leaves BUT (and this is very important) make sure to go down wind and leave one section dry so we can light the leaves on fire. Well, guess what Dustin did...apparently he forgot which side he didn't poor the gas on, and instead of telling us he forgot, he took the 50/50 chance and pointed me in the wrong direction. THE WRONG DIRECTION!  :angry:
    Well, I go to light the leaves on fire, by lighting a rolled up newpaper first, and then throw the paper onto the leaves. Well, the wind is blowing too strong so I go to the "wrong side" where Dustin said he didn't pour any gas but really did and proceed to again light the paper. Again, the wind is blowing too strong, so i kneel down to block the wind and light the paper on fire.
             this is the funny part...at least for everyone
Before I can even get the paper lit, the flame from my lighter ignites the fumes of the gasoline creating a loud BOOM or explosion if you will, enguling my ENTIRE BODY in flames.
    In short, that children is how you create Kenny al a flame   :D
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